💌 Connection #5: The Zero State
1 idea, 1 practice, 1 question
Hi friend,
Here’s 1 idea, 1 practice, and 1 question to create more expansive connections this week.
One idea to consider
The Zero State is a state of being in which you bring a clean slate to a conversation, especially one of conflict.
In the Zero State, you're completely free from past experiences, feelings, or expectations that affect how you see or hear the other person. You’re present, open-minded, and ready to listen without any judgment, like a neutral party.
Being in the Zero State helps achieve:
More Understanding: It’s easier to listen and understand the other person without your own biases or past experiences in the way.
Less Conflict: Removing preloaded negative emotions or assumptions leads to fewer assumptions and misunderstandings.
Better Outcomes: Openness to other perspectives leads to more effective and compassionate communication, and better results.
One practice to try on
Notice if you’ve left the Zero State by checking for these 3 divergences:
Being Preoccupied: If you’re thinking about something else, like your to-do list or a recent argument, you're not fully present.
Holding onto the Past: If you’re still feeling or thinking about past hurts or grievances, you won’t bring a blank slate to the table.
Jumping to Conclusions: If you already have an idea of what someone will say, do, or think, you aren’t fully open to new possibilities.
Introduce the concept of the Zero State to someone you care about. Bring awareness to whether you’re both in the Zero State the next time a tough conversation comes up.
One question to ask
“What character trait makes you instantly respect someone?”
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